General
What’s That You Say? Reading Body Language in Play – By Rev You’ve heard it said (and if you haven’t, it’s about time you did) that Dominants aren’t mind readers. It’s said for a reason. “Dominant-as-mind-reader” is one of those persistent stereotypes that’s hard to kill and can really cause problems for new and/or isolated … Read more
Hello! I’m Heather Daisy, and you might remember me from such films as “What To Do If Your Partner Is Horny” and “What To Do If Your Partner Is Into Breath Play.” Today we explore the wide and wonderful world of TRIGGERS. A trigger is an action, word, emotion, smell or other noun that causes … Read more
We often hear people in the scene talking about this Master or that Mistress, this Dom or that Domme, we hear good things and bad things, things to make our hair stand on end, things to make us laugh and things to make us cry. Of course believing everything bad you hear, is not a … Read more
A weak point in conversations about consent and consent violation is that we often speak as though only bottoms can be violated (I am not immune to this) when tops are also violated on a fairly regular basis. My theory on why we do this is we have a much clearer picture of what it … Read more
BDSM 101 – the First Aid Kit – an Essential for Your Toy Bag What Do I Put in My BDSM First Aid Kit? by Bea Amor BDSM practitioner should have a first aid kit and taking a first aid course is probably the best idea you could have. I am going to share with … Read more
What BDSM is not I was recently reminded how much I dislike it when people are so passionate about their own opinions that they assume their way is the only right way, and that reminded me of this essay written in 2005. I hope someone out there finds it useful or interesting, and I hope … Read more
What I am writing here is predicated on the desire for a dom and sub to develop a meaningful relationship that can be lasting. Meaning long-term and not just based on short-term physical attraction, purely lustful desires, or kinky curiosities. This is about the conscious and unconscious emotional characteristics that will enable the dominant and … Read more
A friend recently asked me for an opinion of someone I know in the scene. I thought I would post a part of it here on how I approach providing references and vetting other people in my own play. There is no right way, this is what I’ve found works well for me after two … Read more