10 things to never do with your new to poly or monogamous partner when you are Poly.

  10.Send them unsolicited articles that rave about how great being Poly is. I know you think you mean well, but its just a passive form of shoving it down their throat. Let them figure out for them if this works, Its ok to offer suggestions or to recommend various media source but dont force … Read more

Aftercare for the D

It’s been a while since I wrote my last post for “Attention for the D”. Life happens sometimes… But I would like to pick this back up, because this information is important and I love sharing with you. So here is the next one: Aftercare for the D. Now, most of you are aware that … Read more

What To Do If Your Partner Gets Triggered – by Heather_Daisy

Hello! I’m Heather Daisy, and you might remember me from such films as “What To Do If Your Partner Is Horny” and “What To Do If Your Partner Is Into Breath Play.” Today we explore the wide and wonderful world of TRIGGERS. A trigger is an action, word, emotion, smell or other noun that causes … Read more

What Does it Look Like When a Top’s Consent is Violated? by Ariadne

A weak point in conversations about consent and consent violation is that we often speak as though only bottoms can be violated (I am not immune to this) when tops are also violated on a fairly regular basis. My theory on why we do this is we have a much clearer picture of what it … Read more

What BDSM is not By vegasvixen

What BDSM is not I was recently reminded how much I dislike it when people are so passionate about their own opinions that they assume their way is the only right way, and that reminded me of this essay written in 2005. I hope someone out there finds it useful or interesting, and I hope … Read more

Using Your Safeword Is Not a Sign of Failure By lunaKM

When learning about personal safety and BDSM you likely hear the word safeword more than once. A safeword is used as a last resort when you need the play you are engaged in to end. But there’s an unintentional negative stigma surrounding using your safeword that needs to be understood. You are not a failure … Read more