General
NO is a safeword – unless you negotiate otherwise– Moon_Dancer I hate the phrase “no is not a safeword” and have found myself the victim of non-consensual violence with this used as an excuse. The only time no is not a safeword is when participating in negotiated consensual non-consent. I think we have forgotten what … Read more
The Dreaded, but necessary, Disclaimer We poly in mish mash of swinging, poly and openness and we organize our relationships in a hierarchical way. Our marriage is our primary relationship. Our other relationships are our secondary relationships and we refer to the partners of our partners (the ones we are not directly romantically involved with) … Read more
When you first enter “The Scene,” you will meet a lot of new people who all seem awesome. You will be invited to munches, encouraged to attend events, and welcomed to more than a couple discussion groups. This is all great! It can also be overwhelming. It can lead to what I call “Community Frenzy.” … Read more
This is a Journal entry from Malbon’s writings on Fetlife. Munches are just great aren’t they? A free social event where you can meet other kinky people, maybe even find that elusive compatible partner. The door is open, and you are welcome. But it didn’t work out so well, did it? You felt left out, … Read more
Munch Etiquette When people ask how to become involved in kink or how to learn, the first thing they are told is “go to a munch!” Munches are a great first step, but like all first steps, they can be intimidating if you don’t know what to expect or how to behave. What is a … Read more
Miss Bitch’s Guide to Dungeon Etiquette – the Revival You can deny all you want that there is etiquette, and a lot of people do in everyday life. But if you behave in a way that offends the people you’re trying to deal with, they will stop dealing with you… ~ Judith Martin, aka Miss … Read more
Since writing my last post, I’ve gotten a lot of messages from newbies asking me, “How do I tell the difference between someone who really wants to help me, and someone who is a predator, an exploiter, someone who just wants to take advantage of me?” The short answer is: it’s not easy. If you … Read more
PRIDE and FETISH FLAG GALLERY Common symbols of pride are the rainbow pride flag, the lowercase Greek letter lambda (λ), and the pink and black triangle. This last symbol was reclaimed from use as badges of shame in Nazi concentration camps, and through reappropriation have made these symbols for gay rights. The Greek letter lambda … Read more